Let me start by saying that it’s one of my missions in life to collect somewhat unconventional/borderline unlistenable music. 

That may sound like a waste of time & money, I guess. But I tend to stick to something I heard Frank Zappa say once.

(Okay, that’s not it. Though I tend to believe it 100%.)

No, THIS is it. And I’m paraphrasing, but it goes something *ahem* like this:

“If you try out music that’s difficult to listen to, it’ll be better for you in the long run.”

Now, that doesn’t mean listening to Jandek long enough will suddenly cause you to miraculously enjoy it.

But at least if you open yourself up to something like Residents

The Locust,

Asian Women On The Telephone,

Pink & Brown,

Wolf Eyes

or even Captain Beefheart, 

you’re already several light years away from a lifetime of radio hits that’ve infested your brain since childhood.

Like an aural enema, this stuff can clean out your system, in a way. And without trying, you may begin to at least appreciate it. Or even enjoy it.

That being said, I hit THIS shithole yesterday. 

Honestly, it’s gotta be a front for the very obvious head shop that’s in plain sight.

(Uh-huh. That’s a bong autographed by Tommy Chong.)

And regardless of their shitty & limited selection, I DID find a few notable crowd-pleasers.

(And before you say anything, Styx isn’t where I was going with the whole unlistenable music thing.)

But I also found THIS:

Yes. THIS is my regret.

I know what you’re saying: ”Is this the one with ‘Rock Me, Amadeus’ on it? Cause if it is, you’re a fucking idiot.”

HEY! Name calling’s unnecessary!

No, no. It’s not the one with “Rock Me, Amadeus.” Or “Der Kommisar,” for that matter. It’s his 4th album. And it’s kind of total shit.

I mean, the price was right.

But I’d take being trapped in an elevator to Hell for an eternity,

while the Muzak plays “Metal Machine Music” on eight-track over & over, before I listened to this buttfuckery again.